A Week and a Half in review!

Hello there bloggsters. I'm sorry that I haven't been able to fulfill my obligations to you lately. Allow me to make amends. A few weekends ago I got a rare treat! Early...and I mean early on Saturday morning I went to Basehor High School and watched four of my students play in their second grade tackle football game. There isn't anything like watching a dad pick his son off the ground by his face mask for making a mistake and being off-sides. It really warms the dedicated football lovers soul. Despite the rain, cold, and parent interactions they won 30-20!!! GO CARDINALS! It really meant something to a few of them so I am really glad that I took the time to go. Last week was pretty tame with the exception of the JOG- A-THON (fundraiser) where I was able to watch one of my students run all her laps in a dress and a pair of heels because mom does not understand what dress appropriately for running means. A few place value problems and a thousand blisters later she was ready to go home; her good deed for the school done. This week has been quite eventful. On Monday Mommy-pation essentially broke up with me. She told me her stomach hurt and then burst into tears! I took her aside and asked what was going on. She told me it was hard for her to talk about and then topped that statement with, "I don't want to lie to you anymore!" Normally I find great content in my single life style, but I made an exception and decided to work this one out so we could stay together ;> Later going to pick the kids up from lunch one of my students informs me that they just can't get "Puff the Magic Dragon" out of their head because it is so catchy. Instinctively I thought of Meet the Parents and classified her as a potential weed enthusiast. These feeling only increased when she began to sing it right there in the middle of the hallway. Needless to say my day was made. The only thing that topped it was the inappropriate giggle I got when one of my students once again spelled come ...cu...well you know! On Tuesday we had a real live bee keeper come in and do a presentation with his real life bees. Luckily no stings or fatalities were recorded. During my technology lesson on Wednesday, which was being observed by my University Supervisor, the power went out. Luckily I was able to improvise until it returned. And today one of my students told me that he mom and dad were " breaking up." All I wanted to do was hug her. We had a talk about how Ms. Sadler's parents were broken up too but that it would be okay. Tomorrow is once again JEANS FRIDAY. Hard to believe that this time last week I was headed to the OK Warrior Dash. Anyway we shall see what adventures tomorrow brings! Teaching...man oh man!

Monday, Monday

I have heard that drastic changes in weather can make kids act crazy...today was the living proof of that day. They didn't do anything tooo horrible just talked and talked along with excessive fidgeting. Oh ya and another case of Mommy-Pation started today. Although this time it was less on the mommy more of the pation side of things. I told her to drink lots of water and avoid eating cheese until she could get home...for lunch she downed a cheese sandwhich (more important than the fact that was exactly what I told her not to do, I didn't even know that people still ate those. I mean at least some person had the brains to grill hence grilled chess deliciousness, but plain...no thanks.) I was also informed just before this that my new birth year is 1789. Glad to know that I look so well preserved. On a slightly different note I think that it is safe to say I was an insect slayer in a former life. Today we finished the Constitution and went back to learning about insects. We started our mealworm experiment (and yes they are a gross as they sound). While trying to fork (please be mature) one of them onto a piece of paper he fell threw the prongs and proceeded his downward demise through a crack in the desk and onto the floor. Luckily it was at one of the boy tables for they were willing to dive on the floor and pick him up. To my surprise he survived and I managed to dodge the prison cell once again. If you think that I am overreacting please read previous posts. All in all I can't say that it was a horrible Monday. I even got to see my mom and cook her some dinner "(today is her bday, be sure to fb her!) ;>

Unit: The Constitution, Lesson: Hookers

From the mouth of babes. When reviewing what we've been covering during Social Studies one of my students raises her hand to answer. I get very excited because she does not do this very often. When I call on her instead of giving the guided response of The Constitution she proudly yells PROSTITUTION! How do you bounce back from that? Keep on moving like there is a fire under your butt and redirect students before they can ask too many questions! Then later laugh yourself to tears and tell all your friends when they ask how teaching went for the day. The only thing that trumped this moment today was giving one of my student's an accidental backhand. What makes it worse is he is one of the sweet ones. I was helping another student and went to point at a word that was on the board. Little did I know another student was trucking along behind. Unfortunately I didn't realize this until my hand had made contact with his nose. Luckily no blood, no tears, no lawsuit. I am fairly certain my face turned 8 shades of red because I felt so bad... not too mention for the first time I realized how easy it really is for a teacher to get accused of something and potentially lose their job. Mental notes to self... check left, right, left, and then point.

My Class: Keeping Ficticious Beings Employed!

Ohhhh the items that children bring to school/play with while the teacher is talking (I swear that a book could be written: "101 Things to do with Your Pencil while the Teacher is Talking!"). I was never really into bringing my prized possessions to school. Maybe it was because I was stingy and didn't want to share. None the less I just didn't do it. My students however are firm believers in the opposite. Today I had to hand out bags for earrings, take away a gold chain necklace..again, water bottles, etc. A few weeks ago I had to threaten the confiscation of hand animal puppets. Had I not been so secretly amused I might have. In the big picture though I suppose this is not as important as what my students are losing at school. Yesterday day I had to bloody mouthed kids come up to me smiling because they had pulled their teeth. There are so many first reactions to this: "Don't swallow!" "Don't Touch Me!" "That's Disgusting!" and "I've done better!" But I chose to do what ANY GOOD teacher would do, "Go to the Nurse." Why? Because there is nothing quite like dishing responsibility off on someone else. Especially when there are blood platelets involved. Today one student lost two, another one, and one informed me the tooth fairy should be fired because she did not visit last night. She probably realized her job sucks and went on vacation...I mean giving money for bloody teeth that are not even as big as a pea...what a rip!!! On a total side not my Constitution Lesson went well. I made 20 newspaper hats, "quills", and ink pots last night. We covered the windows and conducted our own Constitutional Convention. We are doing it again tomorrow so hopefully it goes as well. Oh and I did the whole day basically solo because my teacher was at a conference. I am going to be honest with you right now... I LOVED IT!!! The only part that made it not so awesome was the 2 and a half hour staff meeting that happened after the kids got to go home early. I mean what do they expect? Me to work for my paycheck...Oh wait.... All in all I hope the rest of the week goes well!

Santa's List and other names for the Constitution

Friday ended up being monumental in my teaching career. Little did I know that when I slipped on my jeans and Eudora t-shirt that morning that I would be receiving a letter. This letter did not have a stamp, address, and the pony express did not deliver it. I was finishing a note at my desk as my darling second graders came in. One of the girls who I had gotten on to Thursday comes over to my desk places a letter down and quietly walks away. I open the letter to find my first apology note, "I'm sorry that I did not lisin to you, it will never hapin a gana. P.S. I was going to give you a craft I made, but my mom told me to writ a leter instead." (Please don't be concerned as I can spell for the most part. That was her letter word for word." It brought a smile to my face while almost making me feel like a discipline monster. I will say it is nice to get that kind of gratification that high school and college professor generally won't receive so immediately.

For those of you in the real world not celebrating every holiday America has to offer: First off you are getting screwed. Secondly this Saturday is Constitution Day (Fun Fact Alert: The Constitution was ratified Sept. 17th, 1787). Being that this is kind of important since the Constitution governs our country and all we will be studying it specifically the preamble all week. Before I began my lesson today (in which James Madison spoke to the class...ya he is dead but I have magic teacher connections.) I showed them a replica of the Constitution and asked them for ideas on what they thought it might be. Answers ranged from a list of presidents to a treasure map. However the most creative went to "SANTA'S List." The joy I put on their faces by potentially holding the key to their Christmas Presents was almost criminal, but only because I eventually had to tell them what it really was. Maybe I should have comforted them by telling them there is a place for evil people and sinners like me.... Chuck "E" Cheese with no tokens!

It Was Such A Good Year!

Until I began student teaching I thought that using the phrase, "It was such a good year!" only pertained to wine or had an age requirement of at least 65 on it. Teach and learn I suppose. Today during reading workshop one of my student proclaims (out of context I might add) "I can't wait till 2009!" It was so hard to look into that joyful and genuinely excited face and not do two things: 1) Laugh and 2) Not totally crush her spirit when I tell her that 2009 has already come and gone so there is nothing to be excited about. After realizing that 2009 has come and gone... keep in mind this was her kindergarten year making me feel positively geriatric... she looks wistfully and says, "But it was such a good year!" I guess I should have known something like this would be my entertainment for today by the Grasshopper break that started off the morning.

Time: 7:40
Suspects: One student Five Grasshoppers
Purpose: Caught and Brought for show and tell
Criminal Act: Container dropped causing a breakout

Fear not citizens of Eudora! The green and creepy bandits were caught and returned to their plastic home (what is it with me and my grasshopper luck. Must be one of those past life things.)

My late afternoon entailed one of my students sucking and licking their hand trying to get their fist in their mouth. I casually stopped to make conversation about it and was told they taste like chicken. Needless to say I declined the offer to find out for myself.

And as a final chuckle that will really resonate with all the Title 9 haters of the World. Two of my boys were talking about sports and it came up that I like to play basketball. One looked up with all the confusion his face could muster and said "There's such a thing as girl's basketball?" I couldn't help but think of all my guy finds and every kitchen joke they have ever told me. Luckily his friend said of course there is. They even have a women's league of the NBA.

Who knew!?!?

Did You Know? Courtesy of Second Grade

I am supposed to be teaching these children, but I find myself learning so so much. For instance:
Did you know that you can begin having hot flashes in the second grade. I have a girl in my class who is living proof of this everyday about 1:30-2:00. Did you know they have pistachios at their house? Hard to believe, but it is true and when you are asking them reading questions they will be sure to raise their hand and share this unrelated yet nifty tid-bit. Did you know that POKEMON, contrary to popular belief has not actually gone out of style? Turns out some kids these days actually know how to do more with the card besides just trade them (makes me wish that I would have kept mine and sold them for some profit...don't judge...Student teachers have needs too.) Did you know that you will be asked no less than 10 times in a day if they can go to the restroom? There is no cap/ maximum to this limit because sometimes that amount can be achieved by one student alone in the course of a couple hours. Did you also know that most of the time they can hold it? Did you know that a simple reminder about not going to P.E. or recess until the can line up and be quiet still works like gold. Did you also know they can behave like they need to ALL of the time, but want your attention so they wait for reminders? Did you know that the trouble student in one of your classes will draw you a picture of the two of you and title it, "You Are My Best Friend." or in her spelling "You ar mi best frind." For the most part I did and what I didn't I have learned.

By the way my first observation went really well. Guess I fooled her into thinking I knew what was going on ;>

SAY CHEESE!!!

Sorry that I have not had the opportunity to share with you the world of Second Grade for quite a few days. Labor Day weekend threw many things off, including my insanity workouts. I guess that is what happens when you go to a Watermelon Festival in the middle of Clyde, Kansas which has no cell repception (make no mistake it was a FANTASTIC time). Small recap: Friday I learned that one of my students eats so much cheese because she wants her hair to stay blond. Are you aware how hard it is not to smile at that? The constipation episode continues but has moved on to a few other students. Please do not confuse this with Mommy-pation. The symptoms may seem similar but the situations I am discussing here are different children with completely impacted bowels. Personally, I say, "NOT FUN!" I was given permission by one of my students to read to her anytime she was done with her work. Thank goodness that happened because what else would I have done without filling that time with personal read-alouds ;> The sad thing of the day was learning that weight bullying starts even younger. I was able to put a stop to it, but for how much longer well..... I was also asked to be the Star of the Week. Yes mom I am still getting that priveledge wven though I am the teacher now. On to more exciting things....Today I survived the first picture day. Between pigtails, high heels, and toothy grins everyone managed to get their photo snapped. The best outfit goes to the young man with the black long sleeve botton up, golden-rod silk vest and matching pants. Did I mention the vest and pants had black pin-stripe? It was style beyond compare. As we took a group picture outside (organizing 800 students for an outdoor picture= death) I discovered if you close your eyes they sound like a flock of geese and that a whistle goes a long way :> Overall the kids did well today and reminded me that they do know how to be adorable. Tomorrow we begin guided reading groups and workshops; not too mention I undergo my first observation from my University Supervisor (dum dum duuuuuum)!

Jean Friday has a WHOLE NEW MEANING!

Yesterday was a fairly decent day. The kids started their NFL math packets...a.k.a. coolest idea ever! They draft their team fill out some information about them and create that teams helmet. Then every tuesday from now till the end of regular season they will keep track of their teams wins. losses, and points. Then they take all of that info and do different styles of graphs with it. Who knew that meeting ridiculous standards could be so much fun. I taught my first lesson on Metamorphosis. Since my kids have bomb teachers there is even a song. Today the lesson went well with a few unexpected twists. One of my students caught a grasshopper that he decided to bring to school and share with everyone else. Truth be told I am glad that the thing was still alive after what I did to it. You see he brought it in an old ice cream bucket. I found the bucket picked it up and started shaking it around. I heard rocks banging around inside. I was about to open it when I heard some kids talking to one another saying that the student had brought in a surprise he wanted to share. I promptly set down the bucket and walked away (I can't go down for murder!) I let him share during science and then we went on talking about butterflies, did an experiment, and I had a real life butterfly to show them (he was obviously just taking a nap, for the rest of his life that is). Read some James and the Giant Peach and some Classic Berenstain Bears! The highlight of the day was securing my very first EUDORA CARDINALS shirt. I can officially take in the full priveledge that is Jeans Friday! Step back USD 491, cotton will never have looked so good.